Most have caught on by now that Valentines day and its customs are vastly controlled by the entertainment and sales industries. We see little heart-shaped boxes of chocolates in the asiles as early as december, and we see men lining up at jewelers and flower shops.
But even though we know the control that the market has over this “holiday”, we still desire it. And we still buy into the season and do everything that we are supposed to do. The men go all out for their girlfriends or wives, and the wives and girlfriends are always delighted to have those precious moments with their men. However, it would seem that this pattern indicates something; women seem to be more focused on.
Think about it, do men get chocolates, flowers, or fancy paid-for dinners? Not often. Do men want those things? Well, maybe a nice steak 🙂 . But in all seriousness, as a man, its kind of odd how we do not seem to be focused on at an equal level as women on this day, at least in marketing and popular culture. But perhaps this is our own fault?
Men are stereotyped as having limited emotions, independent not caring about the relationship as much, and not wanting to make a big deal out of romantic things. In the same line of stereotyping, women are seen as uber-emotional, dependent, and wanting to make a big deal about romantic things. But at the heart of it, those stereotypes are usually untrue. For we are all humans, and most of us have a desire, a need, a longing, for a companion…and when we have one, its beautiful.
As a quick side note, some Christian groups get uncomfortable with this idea of “needing” a companion other than God, so let me clear that up. Adam was created before Eve, and before Adam could make any petition to God, God said in Genesis 2:18, “It is not good for the man to be alone; I will make him a helper suitable for him”(NASB). Bear in mind that those are the words of God, spoken before the fall, to a man named Adam.
Going on, we know that humans have a longing for companionship, and we know that the need for a companion was first seen in a man, Adam. So, as a man, that tells me that there is no need to withhold my appreciation and romanticism from my girlfriend or wife, and that those emotions are nothing to be ashamed of. It also tells me that men should be focused on during valentines day as well, and I have no doubt that I will feel unashamedly loved on that day.
But heres the thing, I feel loved everyday, I seek to express my love everyday, and I seek to honor and cherish my loved one everyday. To me, Valentines day is just an opportunity to express that love further, and I look forward to showing love, and being shown love on that day, and beyond. Make “Valentines Day” happen more than once a year.
I hope that you have a great Valentines day with your companion; whether this year, or another.